During the teen years, getting a driver's license is one of the biggest steps a young person can take. It can mean freedom, independence and responsibility and it's all wrapped into one wallet-sized card.

When your parents or your grandparents started driving, having and using a car was a rarer privilege than it is today. Yet, the freedom and opportunity offered by the chance to get behind the wheel helped change our nation and its way of life. Your elderly loved one probably was part of that historical, more mobile change.

Your mom and dad or grandparents may have learned to drive at a very young age on a farm. Your loved one may have driven before motor vehicle laws were formalized. Perhaps the special elderly person in your life has driven for 50, 60 or 70 years or more.

Elderly people today are living longer, but some of them reach a point when it is no longer a good idea to drive a car. They reach a point when it's in their best interest, as well as the interests of other drivers on the road, to give up their prized license and turn in their car keys.

For many elderly people, the responsibility of driving becomes too challenging. What once was freedom and independence can lead to confusion or even a road hazard for others if the driver no longer is competent.

Ending the privilege of driving needn't commit the elderly person to being homebound. If it's your mom, dad or grandparent who no longer can drive, suggest alternative transportation. Start with yourself or other family members who can take the elderly loved one shopping or to the grocery store.

Investigate the types of transportation available where the person lives. Buses, commuter trains and taxis can be used, if available. Home delivery of groceries or other options might be a choice. Is a close friend of the person still driving and can that person help?

Consider senior shuttles or community senior transport vans if they're available.

Being able to help mom or dad make the adjustment to slightly less freedom and independence could help your parent live comfortably for many years. The process of helping your parent or grandparent could renew a bond from years past. Having time together can be a precious gift for both of you.

If the issue of no longer being able to drive becomes an emotional struggle or cause for disagreement, put the issue squarely on the state department of motor vehicles. If the elderly person cannot pass the necessary tests, the decision is no longer a whim or a feeling--it's the law.

Some decisions you make with and for the elderly people you love are painful, yet necessary for everyone's good. Patience and persistence are important traits.

Never lose the love you have for the parent who drove you so many places and maybe even helped you learn how to drive.

When it's time, take away the keys in the spirit of care and gentle concern.